At the Edge of His Cloak

This one will be brief, but I wanted to share what I listened to at Ecclesia last night.

The message was simple, but profound for me. The pastor talked about letting go of things in the past and moving on. He cited Paul in Philippians and Colossians and the importance of pressing on toward the goal. He also mentioned the importance of the Spirit in our lives and cited one of my most favorite chapters in the Bible - Romans 8. Specifically, verses 26 and 27 which say,

"In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will."

Anyways, I realized that I have feared coming back to Vancouver for many reasons:

1. Peoples perception of who I am as well as expectations.
2. Never making it "out" again.
3. Facing family problems.
4. Working for my father - which still might happen.
5. Living out a life for God in which I don't feel like I am fighting against my friends.
6. Relationships in the past that I have not handled so well...to say the least.

All that to say, Vancouver has been a place which constantly has brought up great fears of who I am and who I might become. I hope to move past these, be healed by God, and trust in His purpose for me here. I have always struggled with letting go and this is an area where I really need to grow and let go of the past. I don't want to continue living in these fears. Fears, which have propelled me, to work very hard and erasing past conceptions of who I was and who I might become.

I am excited for what God will bring this fall. I hope that it would involve me growing closer to Him as I enter a new part of my life.